The inimitable James Lileks has unearthed shocking biographical data about… Goofy. Yes, that Goofy:

Did you know that Goofy has a last name?…

…In the fifties, Disney decided to give Goofy a family. He has an irritating red-haired son, and a human wife. It’s unnerving, really – here’s this dog-thing with long dog ears, a dog-snout with a round black nose, but he has human hands and big stupid human feet. And a human wife.

…His last name is “Geef.” Goofy Geef. If it ever comes up in a trivia contest, thank me.

Below that, he relates how he tried to help his brother-in-law to edit a movie on a PC, with software supposedly equivalent to Apple’s iMovie:

The movie-editing software was aimed at the consumer, much in the same way that North Korean artillery is aimed at Seoul…

…It’s like getting into a car that won’t let you cinch your seatbelt until you’ve entered a Driving Template (Highway? City? Mixture of the two? Rush hour? Rural two-lane blacktop?)

…And yes, yes, you could, etc. Point is, I’ve found that with Apple, the future is already installed.

…I’ll say this for his machine, though: if he ever wants to back up that 3.3 GB movie file on floppy disks, he’s all set.