Simon Brunning of Small Values of Cool points at the Top 100 April Fool’s Day Hoaxes of All Time. Read this before believing anything else today.

My personal favorites:

The Swiss Spaghetti Harvest

The Island of San Seriffe

The Internet Spring Cleaning (#40, at the bottom – I’ve spread that one myself a few times)

Asterix Village Found (#89)

Update(s): The first items for 2003 are coming in… here are some nice ones. I’ll keep updating this throughout the day.

RFC3514: The Security Flag in the IPv4 Header. This one’s for techies only – if you don’t know what a RFC is, never mind:

Firewalls, packet filters, intrusion detection systems, and the like often have difficulty distinguishing between packets that have malicious intent and those that are merely unusual. We define a security flag in the IPv4 header as a means of distinguishing the two cases.

… Currently-assigned values are defined as follows:

0x0  If the bit is set to 0, the packet has no evil intent. Hosts, network elements, etc., SHOULD assume that the packet is harmless, and SHOULD NOT take any defensive measures. (We note that this part of the spec is already implemented by many common desktop operating systems.)

0x1  If the bit is set to 1, the packet has evil intent. Secure systems SHOULD try to defend themselves against such packets. Insecure systems MAY chose to crash, be penetrated, etc.

TidBITS#674:

…In a move that will no doubt cause even more consternation, Apple today announced that it has again rescheduled the upcoming Worldwide Developer Conference, this time to coincide with the new Create conference that replaced Macworld Expo from 14-Jul-03 through 18-Jul-03.

…The $25 Asbesteze gloves use a combination of Lycra and heat-resistant fibers to keep palms and wrists from becoming too hot (which can exacerbate inflammation) when resting on the aluminum PowerBooks.

…the company announced the Segway Kids Interactive Transporter (KIT), more commonly referred to as the “Segwee.”…

…I’ve been busy helping some old friends at Microsoft’s Macintosh Business Unit (MacBU) with an upcoming release of Microsoft Word 5.1 for OS X, a carbonized version of Word 5.1a that preserves most of the features and all the look and feel of the highly popular Word 5.1…

Apple admits Mac OS X transition a failure; announces Mac OS 9.5, Jobs steps down:

“I blew it. It’s as simple as that,” said a visibly upset Steve Jobs as he announced he would step down as head of Apple, the company he co-founded on this day over 25 years ago.

CFO Fred Anderson quickly announced the company would end its two-year-long transition to the UNIX-based Mac OS X and would release Mac OS 9.5 within the month…

Bare Bones Software Announces New Pricing Option:

…Now available is the option to purchase a single user license of BBEdit with hand delivery by a Bare Bones Software employee and one full year of personal service (including unlimited feature additions, ripping the cellophane off the CD, reading the manual aloud, and more). This opportunity is only available for a limited time, at the special price of US$250,000…

Safari developer Dave Hyatt says that Safari will drop table support:

The next release of Safari will be fully embracing Web standards by dropping all support for tables. From now on, any pages that use tables will cause Safari to play a very loud raspberry sound and refuse to display the page.

…For all sites that attempt to nest tables more than four levels deep, Safari will play a loud flushing sound, and it will remove itself from the dock and erase itself from your system in order to protect itself from your bad taste.