Solipsism Gradient

Rainer Brockerhoff’s blog

Browsing Posts tagged Humor

More LOLology at the Language Log. See also Meme Cats.

So The Onion said:

Hallmark Scientists Identify 3 New Human Emotions

…In 2002, McMurrough monitored the MRI activity of nearly 10,000 test subjects between the ages of 25 and 40 as they described all emotions they had experienced in the past six months and rated each for its intensity, duration, and whether it would be conveyable to others by mail…

The first emotion the project successfully isolated was “requiapathy,” the combination of relief and guilt that comes with the sudden realization that you no longer miss a dead loved one. That discovery quickly led to the uncovering of “seprudity,” the feeling of appreciating a coworker’s dedication without fully understanding his or her job function, and “trepatiousness,” a synthesis of rage and jealousy, though more muted and often accompanied by a sensation of weight-lessness.

Hah.

Of course Hallmark was interested only in emotions that might be “[interpreted] in warm, concise verse; inoffensive, ingratiating humor; and reassuring pastel watercolors” to quote further from the article. What they neglected to say was that several other emotions were also identified, and I present a few of them for your edification.

Debloggery: the combination of guilt and panic felt when you realize you haven’t blogged anything for at least two weeks, and may have even forgot the password to do so.

Backupenia: the first stage of what you feel when your hard drive was wiped out and your only backup disk refuses to mount properly. The following stages are “disconnecticity” (blaming it on the cable and rushing out to buy a handful of new ones) and “declaimitance” (pretending to everybody that you actually wanted to initialize your drive anyway and the lost data were of no significance).

Retradelessness: the sinking feeling you get when you discover, upon returning from the store with your new Mac, that the Apple Store web page is offline in preparation for new products.

Fartusity: the rapid succession of superiority and that “uh-oh” feeling when you whip out your trusty 10″ slide rule at a job interview and the interviewer asks if it runs Linux.

Applemunity: the smugness you, as a Mac user, feel when you overhear two Windows users complaining about viruses.

Well, those guys don’t waste any time: lolgeeks! (thanks to boing boing for the link.)

Update: See also lolbrarians. Found at the highly recommended Language Log; they also comment that “…the field of lolguistics is even more sadly underdeveloped”. lol.

Update#2: Good analysis and l337-katz0rz deconstruction by David McRaney guesting at icanhascheezburger!!!1!1!!

Update#3: Took some time, but xkcd explains all.

Loldevs!

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There’s this new Internet meme going around. Anil Dash has a good writeup.

So here’s my modest contribution, but with a mutant twist. I present to you… loldevs!!!!

If you’re a dev and have a blog, consider yourself tagged. Post a picture of yourself with a caption that fits one of the standard categories, and which alludes to something you’ve been blogging about. Non-devs should be unable to understand the result, of course…

More famous than I realized. David Paul Robinson writes:

Rainer Brockerhoff, long famous for being averse to version control, dips a toe into the svn waters…

Thanks for the link David. icon_wink.gif

Maybe I should do some marketing around this? “No version control system was harmed while building this software.” Heh. Charge extra for admission…?

Uli Kusterer, Blake Seely and Andy Finnell have posted follow-ups to Brent Simmons‘ comments on the topic. Worth a read, too.

Uli started his comment with:

Rainer Brockerhoff, the man without version control, has posted…

OK, I guess I should seize the opportunity to confess that in the past I have looked a few times into using Subversion (aka svn) for version control. Xcode currently supports cvs, svn and Perforce. cvs, by all accounts, is old, clunky and obsolescent technology, Perforce is commercial and expensive ($800 per user), so svn is the generally used solution.

Turns out that svn was written by Unix geeks who were unsatisfied with cvs and wanted more capabilities while keeping many cvs concepts and terms. (cvs itself was similarly evolved from the even earlier and clunkier RCS.) Unsurprisingly the whole family tree is exclusively command-line oriented and requires significant neuron grease to adapt to. As I’ve said before, I became sick and tired of command-line stuff in my early career and was extremely glad when, in 1984, I could migrate to the Mac where there was no such thing. Now that Mac OS X is Unix-based I do use the Terminal when there’s no alternative, but in general I try to avoid it. So I had a fast look at svn and its documentation, decided it wasn’t worth the trouble, and went on doing other stuff.

But over the last few days, with the generous help of several people – among them Matt Gemmell, Daniel Jalkut, Tom Harrington, Jeff Johnson and several others on the #macsb channel – I at least figured out enough to be able to set up a repository on DreamHost and tinker around with it. The first byproduct is now online: you can now check out RBSplitView from its own svn repository. Enjoy.

Does this mean that Subversion has now subverted me into doing all my future work under its benevolent dictatorship? No. Xcode 2.4.1 crashes seriously when I try to turn on the version control checkbox, at least for my most-important project. I have deduced that this happens because of some sort of data incompatibility between Xcode and the contents of the dozens of bothersome .svn folders that it insists in maintaining inside of the folders it controls. For simpler projects or older projects it works; for my XRay II project it doesn’t. Bah. For what it’s worth, Leopard’s Xcode 3.0 seems to have fixed this problem and supports many more svn features than the current version; so I’ll probably try this again in a few months (Leopard is still not stable enough to allow me to use it for actual work).

I was going to list a long series of stumbling points and oddball nomenclature that led to my spending several days (instead of hours) on doing these things that should be easy and “just work”, but I don’t think I’ll have the energy for that. Significantly, there’s no complete Subversion GUI client available for the Mac – or for any other platform, I believe. Apparently any hypothetical geek with the necessary masterful understanding of the subversion client and server will by definition also be convinced that a GUI interface will be wimpy and superfluous. (He will probably also believe the same of Xcode.) Also, the server side is seriously lacking in functionality; you can’t do things as simple as wipe a repository or exclude files committed by mistake.

To explain my feelings about svn at this point, I’ll try to reproduce from memory one of Isaac Asimov’s favorite jokes, “Levine the tailor”. I think it’s in his autobiography. You may substitute any other name you find hilarious. (I also wish I’d somehow filmed Háj Ross when he first retold me this joke.)

Morris went to Levine the tailor to have his first suit made. Levine took the necessary measurements and told him to come back in a couple of weeks. Back at the tailor’s shop, Morris tried the suit on and found that it was a little roomy around the shoulderblades. He called attention to that, and Levine replied:

“No problem. Simply hunch your shoulders out a little and look down, and the problem will go away.”

Morris did so, but upon looking down, noticed “Hey, the left arm is crooked!”

“No problem, just hold your left hand like this [demonstrates] and twist your elbow out a little. You see? It’s gone!”

Morris again did so, but then looked further down and said, “And this trouser seam isn’t straight either!”

“Still no problem, just swing your heel on that side out just so and all fits perfectly!”

So Morris pays and leaves the store wearing his new suit, feeling slightly duped by the tailor. An elderly couple watches him lurch by [you should demonstrate this while telling the joke]. The woman says “Isn’t that young Morris? He must have been in some serious accident. He’s all bent and twisted!”

And the man replies: “He must have been, but his tailor is certainly a genius, to make such a perfectly fitting suit!”

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